Many times in life, we find ourselves in situations where we can’t figure ourselves out. We don’t know why we act or think the way we do. And what we can do if we wanted to change ourselves.

As a typical INFP type personality (yes, I do think there’s some merit to this personality categorization. Don’t know about you, but it works for me at least), I definitely like introspecting and asking questions of myself, and, in the process, discovering more about myself. I may not always be right, but the desire to understand myself better is there.

Even though there are numerous self-help books and articles and talks and so-called “experts”, all telling us about ourselves (some sincerely and helpfully, some not), I think it’s rare to find opportunities to really know ourselves. And rarer still to find those opportunities at the “right” time. Because, to really make full use of any such chances, we need to be in the right frame of mind emotionally and spiritually, based on our experiences. I’ve had instances when the same things have made much more sense when I came across them after certain experiences, when I was in a certain place.

Life is a constant teacher, but one has to be ready to receive the lesson to really understand and remember it.

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But you might ask: “Why does it matter how well I know myself?” Well, to each, her own. Perhaps a person can only answer that question for oneself. Or, who knows, maybe it doesn’t even matter for everyone. There are some who even say that knowing oneself could be dangerous. But for me personally, it matters. It matters a lot.

It helps me understand my interactions with the world. When I start recognizing patterns in my own behavior, and then seeing those same patterns in others’, it reminds me that even though all of us are unique, we are not too different from each other. There’s a certain beauty in that.

Knowing that there are others who may be feeling the same way I do gives me hope. It reassures me that when I face the challenges I do, it’s not because of me specifically – because I’m broken or because it’s my fault – it’s just the way some people are, and that’s okay. It gives me the courage to talk and write about these things. It makes me feel less lonely.

Knowing myself and my triggers and reactions also gives me an opportunity to course correct if required. Once I know what will make me react in ways in which I don’t want to, I can be wary of those trigger traps and / or alter my reactions. I can “act” consciously instead of just “reacting” instinctively.

I can’t really know for sure what someone else is feeling or thinking. But, by looking at my own actions and the psychological drivers behind those, I can try to picture what must be going through someone else’s mind when they act in a certain way. I think that gives me a little bit of empathy as well.

There are more ”practical” benefits as well. Armed with knowledge of the self, I can navigate my daily life in ways that align with my overall personality, and that will bring me most benefits. Examples include the type of job I should be doing, the kind of personal and professional relationships I’ll best thrive in, how to deal with unpleasant situations, how I should manage my finances, etc.

I could go on. But you get the idea. “Know thyself” is an ancient saying, and you can find versions of it across different cultures, and that’s no coincidence. I believe it’s one of the most important (if not the best) tools in our toolkit for leading a healthy and happy life.

Know yourself, and you’ll know the world.

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One final note before I wrap up. While it’s great to know oneself, we must always keep in mind that even though we may think we know ourselves, we could be wrong. We don’t know what we don’t know, and it’s entirely possible that we may have come to the wrong conclusions about ourselves. So, we need to be vigilant, and keep inquiring and revisiting our sense of the self regularly. We shouldn’t rigidly stick to our “known” beliefs, but be flexible to change and adapt in the face of any new information, through our own observations and introspection, or through some other external means (like someone telling us something about ourselves that we may have missed).

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Wish you the best in your journey of discovering yourself. May the knowledge be with you! 🙂

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Photo Credit: Vinicius Amano on Unsplash